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May 8th, 2011

Kevin’s Korner: Getting medieval on Osama, Holding BVP to his word, and We don’t need no stinkin’ badges

By Kevin Hall

Does Barack Obama read  Of course he does.  Want the proof?  Three weeks ago, here in this column, I suggested Sarah Palin or Michelle Bachmann adopt Hulk Hogan’s “Real American” theme song.  Seven days later, Obama used it for his arrival at the White House Correspondents Dinner…    Gotta give him props for that nice jab back at the birthers… And of course, major kudos for nabbing Bin Laden.  Thanks for reading, Barack!  BTW, you still suck as a President.

Frankly, I think we let Bin Laden off easy.  He totally deserved some “Pulp Fiction”-style punishment.  We should have called Marcellus Wallace and had some of his guys get medieval on Osama with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch…  Of course, that would be after they bring out the gimp.

Remember how the libs attacked George Bush incessantly for not immediately interrupting the 2nd graders reading “My Pet Goat” when he was informed about the 9/11 attacks?  Well, those kids are about to graduate from high school now and the media finally talked to them.  The kids’ take?  W. did exactly the right thing.

I had mixed feelings about everyone celebrating Bin Laden’s death.   I love spontaneous outbursts of patriotism, and it was pretty cool seeing the ISU students in Ames, as well as people in D.C. and around the country rallying & chanting “USA! USA!” … On the other hand, Geraldo Rivera clapping and high fiving as he was reporting the news live on FNC was about as unprofessional as it can get for a news anchor…  I had to change the channel because Geraldo was just unbearable.  FNC blew it by not bringing in the A-Team immediately.  I pity the fools who made that decision.

Remember when Cindy Sheehan was the darling of the mainstream media, mainly because it gave them an easy opportunity to bash Bush?  Well, Cindy has clearly proven that she’s way, way out there where the buses don’t run… She doesn’t believe Bin Laden is really dead and is lashing out at Obama.  Funny how the media isn’t reporting that … BTW, if you want to hear sheer lunacy in person, Sheehan is speaking in Des Moines this evening.

Pittsburgh Steelers RB Rashard Mendenhall gets the Stupid Comment of the Week Award.  He’s a 9/11 Truther, which already makes him a moron.  Mendenhall also tweeted that he couldn’t understand why Americans would celebrate Bin Laden’s death and that there might be another side to the story…  Hello, McFly???  Bin Laden admitted he was involved in 9/11.  There is no other side … Kudos to Champion sportsgear, which pulled its endorsement deal from Mendenhall.

Did anyone else notice South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley smiling, applauding and nodding in agreement with Herman Cain’s answer about unions during Thursday’s debate?  Hmmm…   Tim Pawlenty’s campaign offered very special “First Debate badges” to anyone who pledged to watch Thursday night.  Badges?  Really???  Is this the way to lock up the 3rd grader vote? …  Word is, if you watch the next debate, T-Paw will send you a secret decoder ring.

FNC and the South Carolina GOP did the candidates a disservice by barring photographers from the debate.  As a result, the AP boycotted the event, causing the candidates to miss out on nationwide newspaper coverage…  However, I did read two brilliant synopses of the event, which you can read by clicking here … Man, that Craig Robinson guy really seems to know his stuff.  Or at least, he thinks he does…  I actually thought Chris Wallace had the funniest line of the whole debate:  “I never thought heroin would get applause here in South Carolina?” … BTW, the Ron Paul fans still haven’t realized being obnoxious does not help their candidate.

Could Ralph Macchio have made it in the UFC?  Well, if you had any doubt whether or not his Crane Kick in “The Karate Kid” (the original) would actually work in a real fight, check out Lyota Machida using it in last week’s PPV to knock out Randy Couture … So folks, the next time you run across a group of toughs on the mean streets of Waukee, have confidence that the Karate Kid Crane Kick will save you.  Mr. Miyagi rules!!

Our friend Shane Vander Hart asks some very interesting questions about Bob Vander Plaats’ all of the sudden being some national voice for the Tea Party.  His only involvement in the Iowa Tea Party was to use the 2010 rally as a campaign event … Bob is going to D.C. to warn Republicans against raising the debt ceiling.  Funny.  I don’t remember one single time BVP mentioning anything about the debt ceiling during his recent 99 county tour.  Not once.

I do recall BVP saying many times that The Family Leader would do “whatever they can” to prevent late term abortionist Leroy Carhart from coming to Iowa.  So far, they have done absolutely nothing…  Governor Branstad has joined the cause.  It’s crunch time, Bob.  Time for you to hold true to your word and lobby for the passage of the late term abortion ban.

Guess who wins the Liar of the Week Award?  This should come as no surprise. It goes to Commie Tommie Harkin.  He’s pretty much a lifetime recipient of this award…   Here’s what Harkin said about the public policy institute Iowa State plans to build and name after him:  “I never went to Iowa State to ask them to do this.  They came to me and said they wanted to do this.”…   Really, Tom???   ISU’s provost clearly said it was Harkin and his wife who came to them with the idea.

Finally, Happy Mothers’ Day to all the moms out there, especially to the greatest mom in the world, my own, as well as Tina & Andrea.  You are the best!!

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About the Author

Kevin Hall

Kevin Hall brings almost two decades of journalistic experience to TheIowaRepublican. Starting in college as a radio broadcaster, Hall eventually became a television anchor/reporter for stations in North Carolina, Missouri, and Iowa. During the 2007 caucus cycle, Hall changed careers and joined the political realm. He was the northwest Iowa field director for Fred Thompson’s presidential campaign. Hall helped Terry Branstad return to the governor’s office by organizing southwest Iowa for Branstad’s 2010 campaign. Hall serves as a reporter/columnist for

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