April 19th, 2010

You Must Be An Idiot (Someone made the list twice)

Chet Culver

dumbassGovernor Chet Culver unexpectedly canceled a campaign stop in Newton on Saturday. Culver failed to explain why he had to skip the event. Super sleuth reporter, Dave Price of WHO TV 13, noted that Culver was double booked. Price noticed that Culver had events planned in Cedar Rapids at 10:30 and 1:30, which would make it difficult to get to Newton by 3:30.

So while the mystery might be solved, what we learned gives me heartburn. Chet Culver can’t even manage his schedule let a lone the state. Seriously, this dufus would get lost in a paper bag if we could make one large enough. Even worse is the fact that his scheduler probably pulls down $90k a year and had no clue how far away Newton was from Cedar Rapids.

And here I thought that Culver blew off Newton because he was scared he would run into Aaron Brilbeck again. Brilbeck was the reporter who made Culver looked like an idiot for asking the Governor why he came to town to announce things that he had already announced.

Culver, you’re an idiot. And yes, you should fear Aaron Brilbeck, and Election Day.

Brad Zaun

Brad Zaun2State Senator Brad Zaun is a good guy, but he is in over his head. In a press release that announced his underwhelming fundraising totals Zaun said, “While some candidates raise the bulk of their money on the front end of the campaign, we’ll raise ours on the backend.” Yeah, no you won’t. I looked at your report dude, and you don’t have any major donors.

In what’s becoming a Zaun campaign tradition, he also released some internal polling data in hopes to distract from his anemic fundraising numbers. Zaun’s poll showed that since his last poll he hasn’t picked up any support. The poll shows Zaun with 26% compared to Jim Gibbons who has only 7.5%, so all is good.

Gibbons’ numbers actually went up and the guy hasn’t aired a TV or Radio spot yet. The poll also showed that almost 60% of folks are undecided. If Zaun had some financial backing, I’d put my money on him, but he doesn’t. Word on the street is Zaun’s campaign is collecting ad rates. reported that Zaun’s TV buy in January was for $2,850. If he doesn’t get busy raising money, he might be limited to those types of buys.

Zaun is an idiot for running for Congress without a plan to fund his campaign. This is starting to remind me of Paul McKinley’s “aggressive” campaign for Governor.

Chet Culver

Governors VeepstakesTake notice people, you can make the list more than once in a week…

I laughed out loud where I heard Chet on the radio late last week saying that State Auditor Dave Vaudt was misleading the public with all of his talk of doom and gloom. He also blamed Vaudt for playing partisan politics.

For years, Vaudt has warned legislators and Governors Vilsack and Culver about the state’s spending problems. Vaudt was proven right over the past 12 months. Chet looks like a fool when he says these things.

Chet, you’re an idiot for saying Vaudt is guilty of playing partisan politics. It’s just not believable.

O. Kay Henderson

kayI’d never call Kay an idiot, but I didn’t know where else to put this.

Kathie Obradovich of the Des Moines Register introduced the gubernatorial candidates at ITR’s Taxpayer Day forum. In her column, Kay refered to her asthe “mistress of ceremonies.”

Seems a little racy, Kay.

Kathie better be prepared to receive a call from the RNC. I’m sure they will want her to be the mistress of ceremonies for a Des Moines fundraiser. Now they just need to find a bondage club…

I know mistress of ceremonies is a proper name, but can’t we just call her an emcee? Mistress just invokes too many things that I don’t want to associate with Kathie.

The Des Moines Register

washburnI cannot contain my excitement for their May 20th gubernatorial debate.

The debate will last for only one hour.
The debate will be held at noon on a Thursday.
Kathie Obradovich will be the mistress of ceremonies.
Kay Henderson and Dean Borg will also ask questions.

First, someone call Brit Hume and tell him that Nurse Ratched (Carol Washburn) will not be involved. That means if you are a fan of wedgies, this debate isn’t for you.

On a serious note, doesn’t this sound like an episode of Iowa Press? After doing the math, I can tell you this debate is going to suck. After the welcome, opening and closing statements, there is going to be about 40 minutes for questions. Each round of questions will probably take 8 minutes (2 minutes to ask the question, and 2 minutes each for answers). So we are probably going to have a riveting debate that asks 5 questions. Yippee. Let’s pray to God there aren’t commercial breaks.

The Des Moines Register should never be allowed to host debates. All three candidates are idiots for treating them like a legitimate news organization.

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About the Author

Krusty Konservative
Herschel Krustofski is the pseudonym for the anonymous author of Krusty Konservative, a blog which focuses on Iowa Politics. Created in February of 2006, Krusty Konservative is the undisputed heavyweight champion of the Iowa blogosphere. Since its conception, Krusty Konservative has never shied from tackling controversial issues, and providing insight to the inner workings of Republican politics in Iowa.

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