October 8th, 2010

Krusty’s Debate Thoughts

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Written by: Krusty Konservative
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The Moderator:

Bruce Aune of KCRG-TV 9 served as the moderator for the 2nd gubernatorial debate.  Aune began working at KCRG in 1986, so the guy knows Iowa.  What he doesn’t know how to do is control a crowd.

With that in mind, I think that KCRG would have been better served to have Speaker of the House Pat Murphy be the moderator for the debate.  We all know what he would have done after the crowd’s second outburst.  That’s right, he would have ordered the state troopers come in a clear out the audience.

Seriously, the crowd last night was as rambunctious as the people who attended the public hearing on federal deductibility a couple years ago.  I bet Murphy was at home yelling, “kick em out, kick em out” at his TV.  Wait, he was probably door knocking to save his a$$.

Mr. Hankie:

An important sidekick to Governor Culver didn’t make the trip to Cedar Rapids last night and it proved to be costly.  Culver was without his trusty hankie.  It must still be drying out from the last debate.

Sweat Culver:

How the hell does Culver stay hydrated?  Seriously, if we were able to capture all the sweat that rolls off of his face in one debate, we would probably have enough moisture to grow corn in Death Valley.  I’m told that he likes to hydrate at West Des Moines bars on a nightly basis.

Culver Auditions to be New I Cubs Manager:

With Ryne Sandberg’s probable departure from the I-Cubs, it looked like Culver was working on his baseball signs in the debate last night.  At one point I was expecting Beth Malicki to steal home or Lyle Muller to lay down a bunt.

Is it Really a Good Idea have a TV Monitor in Culver’s Podium?

Maybe Culver was signaling for the remote. Instead of watching those awful video questions, Culver probably wanted to flip the channel to Community or 30 Rock.

Gays and Thugs:

It’s becoming apparent that the only people who are rallying around Culver’s re-election campaign are either gay or are union thugs.  After Culver was laughed at, his peeps in the audience cheered for him when he talked about gays or the destructive agenda of the unions.  At last count I think that only gets you something like 15% of the vote it that.

Stop Embarrassing Yourself You Dumb Lug:

Anyone else see Mari Culver trying to get her husband to stop from taking a victory lap after the debate?  While Chet kept waving to the audience, and giving everyone the thumbs up, Mari was trying to get him off the stage.  It reminded me of Ms. Elizabeth and George the Animal Steele.

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About the Author

Krusty Konservative
Herschel Krustofski is the pseudonym for the anonymous author of Krusty Konservative, a blog which focuses on Iowa Politics. Created in February of 2006, Krusty Konservative is the undisputed heavyweight champion of the Iowa blogosphere. Since its conception, Krusty Konservative has never shied from tackling controversial issues, and providing insight to the inner workings of Republican politics in Iowa.

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