October 28th, 2009

Culver: “I’m a Huge Clone”

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Written by: Krusty Konservative

Culver InterviewAfter forgetting to congratulate the Iowa State Cyclones for their huge victory over Nebraska on Saturday, Governor Culver told reporters yesterday, “I’m a huge clone fan.”

Cuvler congratulated the Iowa Hawkeyes for the first 8-0 start, is such a fan of both school he pledged to attend any bowl game they might play in. Culver said, “When the Clones go to a bowl and Iowa goes, maybe to the national championship game, I will be there for both of them rooting them on. Same is true for UNI, who I expect will also be in the mix coming down the stretch.”

WOW, what a leader, what sacrifice!

While the unemployment lines in Iowa grow, Chet Culver is going to take one for the team and attend a couple of bowl games so he can hobnob with potential political donors, drink beer, and probably stay at one of Bill Knapp’s condos. Culver is also scheduled for a Florida trip next month as well. It’s disgusting to watch Culver travel all across the country so he can spend time in warmer states while Iowans struggle to put food on their tables.

I also have to point out that if Chet Culver wasn’t the governor of this state he wouldn’t give a crap about the Hawks or the Clones. He’s not even from here. He attended Bethesda-Chevy Chase High School in Maryland and went to college at Virginia Tech.

Does this sound like a huge Iowa State fan? “I fell in love with the school. It’s a beautiful part of the country and the people there are exceptionally nice. It was just a great fit for me.” That’s what Culver said about Virginia Tech after Iowans elected his as their governor. Maybe he should go back there. Hell, I’ll pay for the shipping.

Wait. That could get expensive.

So in honor of Chet being a “huge Clone,” let’s see how he stacks up against of ISU offensive line.

Left Tackle: Kelechi Osemele 6’5” 349 lbs
Who’s the bigger Clone? Osemele or Culver?
Krusty says Culver

Left Guard: Alex Alvarez 6’2” 295 lbs
Who’s the bigger Clone? Alvarez or Culver?
Krusty says Culver

Center: Reggie Stephens 6’3” 333 lbs
Who’s the bigger Clone? Stephens or Culver?
Krusty says Culver

Right Guard: Ben Lamaak 6’4” 318 lbs
Who’s the bigger Clone? Lamaak or Culver?
Krusty says Culver

Right Tackle: Scott Haughton 6’3” 338 lbs
Who’s the bigger Clone? Haughton or Culver?
Krusty says Culver

Well Chet, you got me. You are the biggest Clone I know.

When looking for some new Chet material look what I found…
Mari culver and edwards
Hmmmm I thought she only had eyes for the big lug…

Maybe she misses the days of a smaller Chet…

lil chet three

About the Author

Krusty Konservative
Herschel Krustofski is the pseudonym for the anonymous author of Krusty Konservative, a blog which focuses on Iowa Politics. Created in February of 2006, Krusty Konservative is the undisputed heavyweight champion of the Iowa blogosphere. Since its conception, Krusty Konservative has never shied from tackling controversial issues, and providing insight to the inner workings of Republican politics in Iowa.

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